April 30, 2011

I Have a Dream

I know our family is in a minority. I'm about to ask a question that only a few will be able to answer. Does anyone else that homeschools their transracial family have a really hard time teaching segregation? I managed to get through the grief and horror of the holocaust with some grace, but segregation stopped me in my tracks. We are moving along through history and stumbled into the 50's and 60's. I usually preview some of the longer books that I let Everett read on his own, but the ones I read aloud I don't read beforehand since I can skip or just close if it turns a corner that I don't want to go. Over a snack last week we were reading about Martin Luther King Jr and I was having a really hard time getting the words out.

The idea of segregation is very far fetched to our children. Almost like, 'Wait this is recent, these are normal people who are treating other normal people like this?' We read several picture books that deal with Jim Crow laws in the south. I was keeping an eye on Sally and skipping some sections that seemed so raw. As I was reading, looking around the table at the kids and their variety of skin tones, I couldn't help but feel like this was a history lesson that they needn't learn so young. I kept cringing at the words, "Whites only" or "Colored". They sounded ugly and confusing. Eli's cheerful take on this was, "Well, if we lived back then we'd just sneak library books for Sally and Jojo since they couldn't get a library card." Hmmm. Except I don't think our family would have existed back then. That thought made me so sad and ashamed.

We ended on a high note with a short video at the end of the week about Martin Luther King Jr's life. With all of my hesitation and worry about giving some kind of residual complex to each of the children about Whites vs. Blacks; the week ended with "one day right there in Alabama little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers." Everett turned the TV off and said, rather optimistically, "Yep, that's just like us. Sisters and brothers."

7 comments:

Greta said...

That is beautiful, Apryl! I loved it. You know, since my experience to EThiopia and our new "family member," Selam, our boys don't even notice that either and I only wish we would have had more contact with others not just like us before this. Thank you for your reflection. I've been there with certain books and know exactly what you mean.

Anonymous said...

Apryl, coming from a transracial family (I'm now 40 yrs old), things weren't sugarcoated. Part of it was knowing where you came from and the sacrifices that were made so that you could have opportunity.Part of it was teaching your kids that life can be hard and unfair and you may need to buck up and deal with it. I think having a realistic view (the good, the bad and the ugly) helps kids cope in the long run.

Apryl said...

Thanks, guys! It's hard to know how our choices as parents will come back later on--your views are certainly appreciated!
apryl

Anonymous said...

Apryl, I had another thought. I'm White, African, Mexican, and Native American. Individuals in each of these groups either chose to do what's right or wrong (in history). No group is all good or all bad. I try to focus on individuals in history (of whatever ethnicity) who chose heroism. I also try to spotlight individuals/families who relied on their faith to help them to stand strong during affliction.

Anonymous said...

One more thing. THere's a children's book about the first little girl to desegregate the schools. The national guard had the take her to school and there was a crowd to harrass her every day. The book tells how everyday she prayed for those yelling racial slurs at her. True story, very powerful. Its not about color-its about living the gospel of Jesus Christ, wherever we are whatever our circumstances.

Apryl said...

Well, that sounds like a book I wish I would have found! The books weren't terrible, just hard to read aloud. Thanks so much for your advice and input!

Ryan & Carly said...

Well I guess I will be contacting you for tips when we get to that point in our homeschooling journey! Haven't been to your blog for awhile. I thought it was funny that you have the same banner as me! Guess we have the same taste in cute kids and cute blogs. :)